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When did this blog take some pathetic turn for the worse, when did it succumb to some maudlin whiney bullshit one tracked theme of hospital perils. I can't seem to break out of it though. But you know, its so weird, when your only external stimulus is SITTING IN A HOSPITAL WITH NOTHING ELSE TO THINK ABOUT except that I'm still sitting in this effing hospital and I'm not at home, and um, I'm also in the hospital and miserable about the fact!? Then yeah, I guess thats all you get to read about until I leave. And speaking of leaving, right now I really feel the need to inform you that I sat and cried like a little baby in front of 5 doctors yesterday who told me my now new soonest release date is Monday. But that is if I can meet a lot of extraneous medical hoopla and criteria over the course of the next 48 hours. So, in Doctor speak, Monday means 2017. and I cried in front of all of them. and they barely batted an eyelash. In fact, I think I heard cash wagers and congrats of my imminent breakdown being divvied up outside my door as they left.
On the bright side, after searching in vain for the bariatric unit, the place where they keep all the new babies behind a glass window, and the psych ward (where we also hoped they would be displayed behind some nose/finger smudged glass display), my sister and I had profound luck stumbling into the PT gymnasium. It seemed as if maybe it wasn't where we were quite supposed to be, but seeing as they left some lights on, and the doors were unlocked, and most of the equipment was still conviently plugged in and on.....gosh how *couldn't* we have helped ourselves.
Today my adventures will take me outside. I plan on dragging my IV pole around campus. Keep an eye out for me. In fact, put a present or two in your pockets just in case you run into me, because material goods are just the thing I need to keep my morale slightly above the level of death.
3 comments:
i shit you not, kz and i have been sitting here debating for 20 minutes how we could find enough cash to get you a nurse stripper (female) and how we'd find out what hospital you're in, and whether or not strippers would visit a hospital on holy easter sunday in the south.
we're working on it.
well then, for the record, I am in 5-WEST 5216 at UNC Chapel Hill.
yup. that's where i'll be. waiting. even after they discharge me.
if sabs follows through, I'll chip in and make sure the nurse stripper comes equipped with all the accoutrement one might find at oh, say, Casbar. Just to really round things out.
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